Have you ever heard of a purity ring? That picture is of mine. Today I am going to explain just what my purity ring represents for me, why I wear it, and why I’ve made the commitment it represents.
What is a Purity Ring and what does it mean?
A purity ring is a ring (no, really? :-)) that symbolizes somebody’s choice to remain ‘pure’ until they marry. While no one can truly be pure in that we all sin, I want to please God my father in how I live my life, including how I will approach romance, physical relationships, and my future marriage (if marriage is something God plans for me). This is the kind of “purity” that I’m talking about today.
In short, my purity ring means that I will not date anybody until I am old enough to marry. I won’t kiss anybody except my husband, and I won’t treat anyone, physically, as I would my husband.
Why do you choose to make that commitment?
Lots of people claim to have had their hearts broken at one time or another. A lot of married people still have sore spots from old romances and things that they did that they don’t want to tell anybody. A romantic relationship that is broken off can hurt both people involved in it. The hurt hearts can become more hardened, and this can make people less loving and trustful of their future spouses.
I am NOT saying right here that you’ll never get your heart broken if you make a commitment like that. Things can happen, like courtships before marriage are broken off, and things like that. The difference here, between sad things happening in life versus dating, is like the difference between walking on the sidewalks rather than in the middle of the road; you could still get hit, even with all the precautions you take, but it is much less likely. 🙂
If you are dating somebody with no reason other than to have fun, you are almost certainly going to be hurt when the relationship breaks off. This is bound to happen if you are a teenager who is years away from being ready to marry, or if your choose to date, for fun, someone you know would never be a good spouse for you.
Another reason I choose not to date is that God doesn’t want us to awaken those romantic feelings before the right time:
I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, that you not stir up or awaken love until it pleases. ~Song of Solomon 8:4
There will probably be a time for you and for me to fall in love and get married, but to awaken those feelings too soon is not what a God wants. Romance can bring temptations for actions that God wants us to save for marriage.
It may seem fun to be in love with somebody for a little while, but in the long run, you would be better off to just ignore dating and romance, until you are prepared for marriage.
How would somebody apply this in their own lives?
Now I’m sure somebody’s asking: “But what if you don’t get married at all? Wouldn’t it be sad to never have romance in your life?” My answer is that it’s true that not everyone gets married. Most people do; however for those that don’t, the Bible calls singleness a gift.
I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that. Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am. ~1 Corinthians 7:7-8
If I never get married, then that God’s will and I should follow what He says.
The best way that I apply it is to imagine that every person who comes into my life that I may be attracted to is married, and that I am married to Mr. Question Mark, not to a person that I know right now. At thirteen years old, I’m years away from marriage, so everyone is considered unavailable in my mind.
For now I won’t focus on who is going to ask me out on a date and who I’m in love with, but I’ll focus on how I can better prepare myself for my future serving God, whether in marriage or singleness.