Two things happened last week that inspired (or should I say prompted) this post.
First, I finished reading Kyle & Kelsey Kupecky’s book The Chase.
Secondly, I met a guy at camp last week who could easily be identified as a player.
The Chase was an amazing book about how to trust God with your “happily ever after” and chase Him instead of chasing guys. Not only did it inspire me to pursue God even more, but it also gave some helpful tips of how to treat guys. For instance, The Chase mentioned that us, as girls, should encourage chivalry and respect in the guys in our life. Saying thank you to a guy when he holds the door open for you is a great start. In preparation for 9 am to 5 pm camp that week, I decided to put this idea into practice. I never expected to encounter a guy who might have been showing chivalry for the wrong reasons.
So I met a guy at camp, let’s call him Joe. Monday and Tuesday Joe seemed like a really nice guy. Friendly, easy to talk to, and fun. I thought of him as a friend. And then Tuesday evening came. He told me that he liked me. I had no idea what to say. No guy had ever told me that before. It was flattering…and frightening. Wednesday just got worse. Joe followed me around constantly, sometimes making awkward comments. That evening he asked me out. I had never been so thankful for my parents rules on dating. I told him that I wasn’t allowed.
Thursday came and I realized that Joe practically ignored me. In fact, he was now onto another girl, whom he asked out that day. She denied as well, also due to her parents rules. And one of the sweet girls I met, told me that on Monday Joe had been asking her weird dating questions, and when he found out she wasn’t allowed to date, he had moved on.
I came to this conclusion. Joe was only friends with the girls for a short while, and then he wanted more. If he couldn’t become their boyfriend, he didn’t see a reason to keep pursuing the friendship.
Here’s what I’d like to share with you Ladies. Navigating relationships with guys can be difficult, heart-breaking, confusing, and downright exhausting. Navigating your relationship with God, on the other hand, is refreshing, calming, rewarding and worth your time.
If a guy ever tells you he is into you (if it hasn’t happened it eventually will, sister!), check to see what his motives are, and whether or not he is pursuing God. I suggest making a list of standards for your future husband. Is he pursuing godliness and righteousness? Does he love the Lord more than anything else? Does he honor his parents? Is he willing to just be friends with you or is he only interested in something more? Look for the fruits of the spirit before saying yes to a relationship you’ll regret. And most of all, pursue God. Chase after Him with everything in you! His plan is perfect, and He knows your dreams and desires.